Monday, April 30, 2012

Fairy Fairy Quite Contrary



About 2 weeks ago Tomato told me that her bottom tooth was wobbly.  I thought that that was wishful thinking as her little friend Kayla P has just lost her bottom tooth and was showing it off to everyone at school.  Well a few days later I realized that she was actually right and there definitely was a wobbly peg that her tongue refused to leave alone.

Last night she begged me to pull it out.  While my stomach turned, I dutifully took a tissue and attempted to pry this tiny ivory from its 5½ year resting place.  Lots of groaning took place (mostly from me) but that little tooth was not budging.  Undeterred Tomato took the tissue from me and headed for the mirror while I went into negotiations with hubby over whose parental responsibility tooth-pulling should fall into.  I went with “this is a man’s job” pretty much my go-to negotiation for all grose things, like taking out the rubbish, the safe capture and relocation of spiders and the removal of dead birds.  I had actually got him to reluctantly agree (because this turns his stomach as much as it does mine) when there was an excited screech from the bathroom “BLOOD!!!!”  Ah yes, another one of those stomach-turning things a parent needs to endure without having any kind of outward negative reaction that could distress the child further, even though inside we are screaming “Noooooo, yuk!!”

I raced to the bathroom and sure enough she had managed to grab it and yank it and it was bleeding but still hanging on by a thread.  My stomach was churning and it took everything in me to keep my dinner where it belonged but there was no time to focus on my nausea because she was wild with excitement and was just waiting for me to come so that she could perform the final extraction in front of an audience.  As the good mother that I am, I encouraged her to do just that and with one quick pull it was out.

*silence* 

We both stared at the tiny tooth in her fingers and then I did the “woo hoo dance” grabbing her and getting excited and then she started to cry.  Mrs Practicality was grabbing tissues to stem the blood flow but Tomato was sobbing…… I must admit I had not seen this coming AT ALL. She had been trying to crowbar solidly-rooted teeth out of her mouth for weeks and when she finally got one out she started to cry?  I was unprepared - but not for long. Not even 10 seconds later she was smiling and laughing and…… crying again.  I think it was so emotional that she didn’t know which emotion to have so she had them all.  I gave her a big hug and gently pried the little ivory from her fist as I had visions of it falling down the drain and the mayhem that would inevitably follow, and we rushed off to show Daddy who was feeding Lettuce, and Bacon, both of whom were suitably impressed.  I could see the relief on hubby’s face that his tooth-pulling duties had been delayed and would not be commencing that night as he had feared.

When I was young younger we had a Tooth Mouse but after a bit of detective work I discovered that Tomato was desperate to have a visit from the Tooth Fairy, so I waved my magic wand and made it so.  After a quick photo op of the toothless child posing in various positions of victory, the little tooth was gently placed on her slipper and the slipper was positioned on the floor next to her bed (I must admit I did not realize that milk teeth were so tiny).  Both Bacon and Tomato fell asleep surprisingly quickly so the coast was clear for the fairy.  
Let’s go back a few days…..
A friend of mine posted on Facebook that her son’s tooth was loose and she asked “what is the fairy’s going rate for a tooth?.”  She received a plethora of replies ranging from R100 to R10 with a whole lot of digits in-between.  I remembered how Kayla P had proudly shown me the gap in her mouth and told me that the Tooth Fairy had given her R100.  I also thought back to my little mouse who could only afford 20c a tooth and wondered whether he was a church mouse.  I also remember my excitement at getting that coin in my slipper.  I then added my favorite ingredient to any situation, the key ingredient that people tend to forget, LOGIC.  Yes the reason we all had to take maths at school, to learn logic.  I flunked maths but I did indeed learn that important logic thingy.  I realized that Tomato had absolutely NO idea what R100 was and I also realized (after a quick calculation of approximately 20 teeth x R100 x 3 children x time value of money + interest) that I did not want to re-bond my house to fund the overly-generous habits of a mystical dental creature.

Back to the present......
A good parent is always prepared.  A great parent is one who was unprepared but made a darn good plan anyway.  Being great parents, hubby and I started raiding all possible coin-rich areas of the house and car and we came up with 2 x R5, 3 x R2 and 3 x R1 coins.  For those who are mathematically challenged let me help you before you whip out your calculator, that amounted to 19 South African Ront.  We decided that the first tooth should fetch R20 (from good parents) R19 (from great parents) and every tooth thereafter would get R10 or as close to that as possible.  I have fond memories of the note that the Tooth Mouse left me and I have kept it all these years, so I decided to do the same for my little girl.  Learning from my brother Dorothy, whose freakishly bright daughter recognized the mouse’s handwriting, I wrote a note, being careful to use my non-ambidextrous left hand!!  I then cut the note out in the shape of a tooth and I was A for away.  
*Note to wanna-be-copycat parents, don’t use coloured paper for added excitement as nobody wants a green/ blue/ pink tooth.

I then put on my Tooth Fairy costume *wink wink* and proceeded to Tomato’s bedroom to get the special slipper.  Panic!  She had dropped her blanket onto the slipper and I couldn’t find the slipper let alone the miniature tooth!  I had visions of them finding the tooth a week later and many many questions being asked.  Groping around the carpet in the dark under Tomato’s bed I eventually found the slipper and the tooth.  Undetected I quietly removed them both from the room.  I arranged the coins nicely in the slipper and tried out various positions for the note and then it suddenly struck me – what on earth was I supposed to do with the tooth??  Eeewwww!!!  This was not covered in the many parenting classes that weren’t offered.  Quick – I’ll ask my Facebook friends, there’s bound to be a night owl like me still awake.  As luck would have it, the same friend whose son has a loose tooth responded with “keep it in her Memory Box?”  Uh.... ok that’s a great idea, I need to start a Memory Box right now!!  (Don’t judge me, you know that your memory box is just a bunch of papers and memorabilia that you haven’t gotten round to putting in chronological order yet).  I gently wrapped up the little tooth in a tissue, put it into a pretty little tin that was handy and deposited said tin in a very high-up spot in my cupboard, promising myself for the 100th time in the past almost 6 years of Tomato’s life that I would sort out her Memory Box.  I hoped that I would do this before I began mixing up teeth by adding in Bacon and Lettuce’s teeth as they fall out into the same box - oops!   I then sneaked into her room and left the loot.


The next morning I could hear the shrieks of excitement through the bedroom wall as the slipper was discovered.  Tomato came rushing into our room for me to read the “tooth-note.”  She was soo excited that there had been a real fairy in her room and she got her own EIGHT COINS!!!   She insisted on telling everybody she met that day and she is still telling people she hadn’t yet seen that she got EIGHT COINS!!! 

She has a few money boxes that she plays with and uses our loose coppers whenever she can find them.  Now she has since made herself a money box out of the round Melrose Cheese box.  She cut a slot to put her coins in and taped the sides closed for added security.  I suddenly realized that sometimes we as adults are over-thinkers.  Our small children don’t know the value that we place on things and I had to smile when she came to me later that day and confided to me that she was glad that the fairy didn’t leave her “a paper money."  When I asked her why she said "Because it’s boring.”  I gently tried to explain to her that you can buy more things with paper money but she didn’t care, she just said “But Mommy you can’t post paper money!!”
Touche Tomato, touche.

Post Script - 27 Feb 2013
Tooth number 3 has just been yanked out, much to the delight of Tomato!  Amazing how the blood from that is thrilling but any other blood is a catastrophe!!  When she woke up this morning the Tooth Fairy had left R10 in the shape of a heart.  Who knew Miss Fairy could do money origami!! 







Legend - BLT refers to my children:
Bacon- 3½ years
Lettuce- ½ year
Tomato- 5½ years
Still confused? – see my first Blog Post

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

39 Winks


During discussions on whether or not we should have a third child, we were well-aware of the parenting pitfalls we would encounter as we had earned our stripes practicing on the first two offspring.  The “Things To Consider List” included things like costs, time, energy and the inevitable sleep deprivation that comes part and parcel of a newborn in the home.  In my experience this sleep deprivation continues well into the young child years because as soon as they begin to sleep through the night, they start teething which keeps them awake, my personal favourite at the moment is when he rolls onto his tummy and can’t roll back yet, so he starts to scream.  After the first year or so “scared of the dark” takes over and finally we have a plethora of sleep-nabbers ranging from monsters under the bed, to “there’s a mozzie in my net” to last night’s one, “the house just seems spooky”.  This of course excludes any real issues such as the duvet slipping off the bed and making them cold, ducky falling down the back of the bed, the child falling out of their bed, wetting their bed, vomiting, illness and of course thunderballs and lightning, very very frightening (Gallileo!!)   Anyway the list goes on and on so we were under no illusions as to how sleep deprived we would become (we meaning the Royal we – me).

So I thought I was doing very well.  Lettuce is a dream baby and even though he generally wakes up for one bottle during the night, he burps himself and then goes straight back to sleep.  Thanks to Pampers I don’t even need to do a nightly nappy change, so I really can’t complain but even so, night after night of late nights and interrupted sleep starts to take its toll on one’s mental faculties.  We’ve had a few funny moments with the kids who love pointing out my mistakes.  For instance yesterday instead of saying toilet paper, I told them we need toilet powder – yes the stuff that you powder your bum with, apparently.  In the morning I’ve told them to put their pyjamas on or they’ll be late for school (while they’re still wearing them), I’ve asked what they want for dinner at 7am and I’ve told them to go and bath instead of brush their teeth!  Harmless fun that keeps them amused. 

But sometimes it’s not so funny.  For instance I have been working on a project that is so exciting but I’ve been burning the midnight oil.  So I was at a meeting sitting next to a colleague who I’ve seen around for years but only started working with in January and we get on really well.  He had his laptop open and I had mine and when I referenced an item he asked me to mail him the document I had just quoted – pretty standard stuff.  So I hit “forward” on my email and then hit a blank with my cursor positioned on To:.  I suddenly became really interested in the rest of the meeting discussions but he was keen to see the document and he leaned over and asked if I’d sent it yet so I returned my focus to sending the mail, but now he was watching me closely.  After a looong hesitation he leaned over and said “It’s Andre, my name is Andre.”   I wanted to die.  Not only had I completely forgotten his name, but he realised that I had completely forgotten his name!! *blush*

This same project, as I mentioned has had me putting in a lot of hours.  Fortunately I am well-kitted out at my home office.  I have a large external monitor, keyboard and mouse because I hate working on a laptop, as well as my personal PC, so I keep work and private stuff completely separate.  So when I sat down one morning, coffee in hand, prepared to do a big chunk of the work and my external screen from my laptop wouldn’t work, I was a bit panicky.  I tried all the usual things like rebooting etc but I eventually resorted to phoning hubby for some PC Support but I knew that he was having a hectic day too, so this was a last resort.  We tried everything, checking the monitor properties, yes I had definitely pushed Fn+F7 and chosen external monitor, we just couldn’t figure out what was wrong.  We knew that the monitor was operational as my personal PC was working fine and I eventually heard the dreaded words “I’ll have to have a look at it when I get home.”  I tried not to sound hugely irritated, because on the bright side, at least my keyboard and mouse worked.  Feeling sorry for me hubby gently suggested that I try rebooting one more time and also suggested that I unplug all the cables and re-attach them because maybe one of the monitor plug pins had gotten squashed when I plugged it in.  So while he was still on the phone I unplugged the mouse and keyboard cable and had a look inside and said “there aren’t any pins in here” so he patiently responded (probably rolling his eyes) by saying that it was the other plug that had the pins to which he was referring.  “The other plug?....... Huh?” yes I did say that aloud (damn!) and then I started laughing, yes, you guessed it, I had not plugged the monitor cable into the laptop.  Coffee was coming out of my nose by this time and hubby was not really feeling the joy after spending 15 minutes of his time with Blondie on the phone.  Now the reason why this is even funnier is because I have been working from a laptop on an external monitor for almost 10 years, so I pretty much know what cables need to go where.  Previously he has asked stupid questions like “did you plug it in?” but I would take great offense to this on previous occasions telling him that I was not one of those moron users where the problem lies between the desk and the chair, so he daren’t ask.  I’m sure this is when those wedding vows ring true – for better or for worse.

But wait, it gets better.  We went to my mom last weekend for a visit and she casually asked “how did you like the curry?”  My brain went into overdrive – nothing.  “What curry?” well that started a tongue lashing of note about how wasteful I am and I probably just threw it out or gave it to the maid.  I was a little dumbstruck but searching the dark abyss of my memory was proving fruitless so I had to admit that I really really didn’t remember her giving me said curry.  Well, cheesed-off would be putting it mildly, her nose was definitely out of joint as she could even pinpoint where she was standing, saying goodbye to me, handing the vacuum sealed frozen meal to me through the car window while I was rushing off to fetch the girls.  I had to believe her, my short-term memory had become temporary unreliable.  My concern over my memory rapidly shifted to the pressing issue of a potentially 3 week old lamb vindaloo in a vacuum sealed, now ready-to-explode bag in my beautiful car!!  We got home and while hubby cavity-searched my vehicle, I enjoyed a bit of frostbite from unpacking both my freezers and then the maid’s freezer to be absolutely sure that I hadn’t whipped it straight out of the car and into her freezer.  Nothing. 

Two days passed and while out with friends I received a text from my mother.  Usually I don’t read texts while I am with friends but I can count the number of text messages I have received from my mother on one hand, so this had to be an emergency.  It was short and sweet and to the point – “humble apologies I gave the curry to your brother.”  WHAAAATT????  How to mess with someone’s mind!!!  And to make matters worse, it wasn’t as if she had remembered, my brother popped in and casually mentioned “hey that curry you gave me was quite nice” otherwise, to this day I would be thinking I was losing it b-a-d-l-y.

Hoo boy, it was bad enough me blaming my lack of sleep for this memory malfunction, but now it looks like it may be genetic!!

 

Monday, April 16, 2012

Out of the Mouths of Babes


I love my children to pieces.  There is nothing I would not do for them.  I love playing with them, I love hugging them and I love making them laugh.  They truly light up my life.

I have recently had the freakin’ hectic task privilege of spending large quantities of time with my 2 favorite daughters who happen to have been on school holiday for 3 weeks!  Add to this a teething 5-month old, very little shut-eye and balancing lecturing and a new work project and you have, well, my life.  We’ve had some fun times, playing at the park, wading in the river and building river sand castles and floating stick-boats.  We've done crafts like sand art, plenty of puzzles, had tea parties, made crumpets and pancakes and generally eaten far too much delicious junk.

My absolute favorite thing to do is to listen to Bacon and Tomato chat or play together, it really makes me smile about how they think.  Tomato being the oldest manages to manipulate Bacon into doing various things her way!  E.g. Tomato says “Bacon, your horsie must be the mommy”  Bacon says “No, my horsie will be the baby”  without skipping a beat Tomato will say “Pretend your horsie is the mommy and she has a baby” quick as a flash Bacon agrees because there’s a baby in there somewhere, and this is how the game goes on, sometimes for nearly an hour, with Bacon totally oblivious to the blatant manipulation.  They do play very nicely together…… most of the time.

Overheard when they had their 4 hour camping session in the Wendy house:
T:  Stop grabbing my blankie (giggle)
B:  Wiggle wiggle
(giggling) 
T:  Mommmeeeeee
Me:  Yes?
T:  Just checking where you are
B:  Wiggle wiggle (hysterical giggling)
T:  There are crickets out here
B:   Mmmmmm
T:  Hope there aren’t any bats.  Mommeeee are there bats here?
Me:  No
T:  Oh, ok just checking………. Are you sure?  I think I saw one!!
Me:  Yes I’m sure, go to sleep!
B:  Ow you hurt me
T:  Sorry
B:  That’s OK (excited squeaking)
T:  Shhhh Mommy is going to get cross
B:  (More excited squeaking)
T:  B-A-C-O-N!!!!!
B:  Yes?
T:  Be quiet.  We should have brought more toys
B:  There’s some in the dupspin
T:  It’s dustbin, dustbin, say dustbin
B:  Dupspin
T:  Aaaagh never mind!!  Go to sleep
B:  You first (hysterical squeaking and giggling)

Ah yes very cute to listen to.  Interesting that Tomato is correcting her sister when she still says Cutecumber (cucumber), Complayx (complex) and Reddio (radio).  I must admit that her vocab is very good so I haven’t really corrected her on these mispronunciations because I’m still enjoying the cute factor.

Ja Ons Praat Nou die Taal
Anyhoo, seeing as we had a lot of time together I thought a new language was in order.  Now Afrikaans is the only other language that I know.  Well OK I did take Zulu until matric but I wouldn’t go bragging about how fluent I am.  I don’t know any swear words in Zulu (which is the obvious acid test) but I’ve pretty much mastered the Afrikaans ones.  I’ve been practically crying with laughter imagining the little Afrikaans lady who’s B&B is on Kant Straat, pronouncing her address in her best English to potential non-Afrikaans-speaking visitors and I just love the word kak, it simply says it all.  It is also very true that there are many sayings that are just not translatable like “my gat se deksel”.  

Anyway I thought it was time the chicks learnt Afrikaans.  So we’ve been going through a few vocab words and meal times now include “Dankie Mama en Papa” and “asseblief” and anything else they ask what it is in Afrikaans – very cute.  I sometimes forget how small Bacon is, so I kissed her goodnight and asked her if she’d had a nice day and she said “Ja Mama” how cute!  But then she said “how do you kiss in Afrikaans?”  Shame I think she was looking for the word, but I thought that was adorable!  Funny how they both cottoned onto sjokolade (chocolate) so hubby and my secret language is under threat of being understood dammit!! 

Toilet Training 101
Bacon is now nappy-free (woohoo!) but I always take her for a quick wee when I go to sleep, just in case she can’t make it through the night.  This has given me endless amusement, from her almost walking into the wall, falling asleep on the toilet and last night was my favorite when she got off, wiped and threw the paper into the bath!! 

Not so fun but funny
Yes, we’ve also had the tantrums.  Interestingly I’ve been screamed at to “stop using your plastic voice!!” which apparently is the voice I use when I pretend to listen to what she’s saying, but we’re still doing it my way!  I think she’s meaning sarcastic / sarplastic LOL.

Tomato also informed me that she doesn’t want to get big and have children.  When I asked her why, she explained that she is a nice girl and really doesn’t want to have to shout at her children (ouch!) 

Well they’re both back at school and I had to chuckle when Tomato came home and informed me that she’s started drama.  She told me that she told the teacher that she’s really good at drama because her mommy says she’s the drama queen!  She was not impressed with my snickering and I wanted to explain what a drama queen was, when she pulled her top up to show me her belly button and swung her hips round and round singing “I’m sexy and I know it” OMW! she’s only 5!  And of course she's taught it to her sister!!  So pleased to see us reaping the rewards of her private school education. 






Monday, April 9, 2012

The Bunny came and the Bunny went

The Chocolate Easter Weekend
Oh boy is Easter an exciting time in our home!  Just the thought of chocolate eggs and bunnies drive Tomato and Bacon wild with anticipation.  Then add in Hot Cross Buns (and the new chocolate chip ones) and you have a recipe for a sugar-induced, hyperactive weekend.



The stores have been marketing their Easter goodies since February so the girls have been counting the sleeps to when the Easter bunny would bounce through their garden depositing various yummy treats for them to find. 

The long weekend started off extremely well with Meema (Grandma pronounced by a 1 year old Tomato and the name stuck) having the 2 girls over for a sleep-over.  The girls were so excited but nobody was more excited than Hubby and me!  Hubby even got up for the 3am feed woohoo!!  We then got to shop for Easter eggs with only a baby (what are new parents on about?  One infant in a pram, One child waking up at night and One child needing breakfast (a quick bottle) and then going back to sleep!  Well it was pure bliss.  Then more bliss followed as choc chip Hot Cross Buns were hand delivered to us on the couch by Meema (probably thanking us for coming to collect our tots - hee hee).  BTW interesting security system American Swiss have going on at the Mall, when the alarm is activated smoke begins to pour out of the store, coupled with a strobe light (to induce jewelry-thief epilepsy I assume) wowee I felt like I should get down and boogie, before I realized it was a security breach!   The sign on the door does state that in the event of alarm activation a “smoke cloak” will be set in motion – ooooh a smoke cloak, exciting stuff!

Easter Saturday
On Saturday we went for lunch with fab friends at feastt in Parktown North where I just happen to know the chef (yes I am name-dropping because one day he’ll be famous and I want people to know that I know famous people – watch this space…).  Anyway the food was to die for - if you haven’t been there yet, get your butt over there and ask for my dessert (yes I have a dessert named after me – see how I surreptitiously managed to mention that too?  I truly rock :-)  Anyhoo in a similar incident (okay not really) when the builder needed paint colors for our house I couldn’t decide on an existing color so eventually I made my own color which is called…… wait for it….. Lisa (I know, how original, but I never forget it when I need more) but paint never really floated my boat but now I also have something close to my heart named after me, yes, chocolate.  When you go there ask for the Lisa Chocolate Torte – go on, don’t just stand there, go and order one!  But let me first warn you, it’s not for sissies, if you’re the type that opens up a slab of chocolate and has one block and puts the rest away for another day, this dessert is NOT for you, but order it anyway, have your one spoon, say “oh my this is so rich” and bring the rest for me – ok?   Sorted.  PS - If you ask for the Sarah Chocolate Torte you'll probably also get the same thing but just humor me ;-)

Easter Sunday
Okay, I must admit and yes, you probably guessed it already, I am the Easter bunny (shhhh don’t tell anyone).   Any parent with more than one child will understand the one and only rule of the hunt – at the end, we put all our eggs into one basket (ha ha yes this does ring a bell) and we share all findings equally amongst the egg hunters (and a few for the basket holder).

In previous years the girls were smaller and less observant so it was quite easy to manipulate the Easter egg hunt.  I would purchase a small box of marshmallow eggs and hide them around the garden with a few small bunnies.  The girls would find an egg and race to show me and put it in the communal big basket.  I quickly realized that a box of eggs didn’t go very far with 2 children rampantly looking, so to prolong the excitement, while the girls were hunting in the bushes, Dad would grab a handful of already discovered eggs out of my basket and re-hide them.  I know, very sneaky but this led to many more exciting discoveries and the shrieks of excitement were just divine for us parents and when it came to the sharing part nobody noticed that there were a lot fewer eggs in the basket than were actually retrieved.  Everyone was happy, okay well maybe not the neighbors, but maybe they don't like sleeping in on public holiday Sundays, you never know ;-)

But Tomato is getting close to 6 years old and prides herself on her counting abilities and she has also inherited some chocaholic tendencies, so this year I had to revert to the normal Easter hunt being  "what you find, you actually get".  So I nipped downstairs while the girls were distracted upstairs with the iPod and The Big iPod (the iPad) and I quickly hid the eggs.  Bacon got distracted by the pop-up chicken inside a plastic egg, so Tomato found most of the chocolate ones.  The girls were delighted that the bunny had been within their reach and eaten one of their home-grown tomatoes that they had left for him!  They smashed 3 eggs before I managed to step in and reason with them that they need to eat breakfast before resuming the chocolate buffet.  Bacon agreed and promptly ordered chocolate Pronutro for breakfast!!  Seriously I don’t know where they get this gene from!!

After the home-hunt it was lunch with Granny and Grandpa and the bunny had visited there too, so by last night Bacon and Tomato were over-sugared and shattered.

Easter Monday
Today was date-with-daddy day so Tomato was up bright and early (much to our horror) and dressed to go out to the Planetarium with Daddy (she loves planets and space and of course spending time with Daddy).  They had a wonderful day seeing planets and eating ice cream and I had a wonderful day with the 2 littlies.  It hits home when you realize that you hardly hear the little one’s voice because Tomato is always so much louder and dominates the conversation, so it was nice to just chat to Bacon with Lettuce gurgling quietly in the background - wait until he starts talking - yikes!
 
In the mall, a very kind, rather good-looking guy offered to help me as I was pushing the pram with one hand and the trolley, with Bacon in it, with the other.  I refused saying that it was easier than it looked and he looked like he didn’t believe me, but he didn’t know that this was actually a piece of cake. Seriously it was.  I wasn’t having to break up a fight between who’s leg was touching whose arm in the trolley, or trying to find “the walking/ running away from me, daughter” while doing this same trolley/ pram-maneuver so I was actually having a relaxed day, but only other 3-children parents would have the keen eye to pick up on this and realize that this was indeed, relaxation.

So Hubby got home with Tomato at about 3pm.  I had a quick chat to my brother Dorothy (I call him Dorothy because he now lives in Aus) and we were off for an early dinner to a restaurant that had a play area so Hubby and I could actually talk about our day!  We were home and the children bathed, teeth brushed, stories read and kisses deposited by 7.30pm yeeha!  That's why I've actually had some time to type this!

All-in-all a FABULOUS weekend!

Monday, April 2, 2012

Bacon and Eggs


When Tomato was 3 years old we went to Granny and Grandpa for another Easter hunt and one of the eggs that Granny’s bunny hid for her to find was a beautiful purple egg.  Because she had so many eggs from both hunts, we put them away and she was allowed to have one now and again.   

A few weeks later we were watching the video of the Easter egg hunt and Dad, who took the video knew that there was a part coming up where he asked Tomato what is in her basket and she showed him.  So he got up, went to the pantry and got the purple egg without us noticing and came back and stood near the TV screen.  When the part came, Tomato proudly shows the camera her stash, including the purple egg, Dad leaned forward and pretended to grab the purple egg out of her basket and viola it was in his hand and he gave it to her on the couch!!  Well I think both our faces must have been priceless (but luckily, even as a blonde I did catch on quite quickly) but she was dumb-struck.  Daddy had just taken a chocolate egg right out of the TV in front of her eyes!!  She went ballistic, it was very very funny.

Well Dad has been known for his antics around Easter so it came as no surprise to me when he purchased some white-coated chocolate eggs and was going to trick the girls.  I had told him about the first time we’d had those eggs as children, my mom got into the car and said she better hold the eggs so they wouldn’t break, while my dad drove and then suddenly she started throwing them over her shoulder at us and we freaked out trying to catch the eggs before they smashed all over the car, we thought she’d gone mad.  

So yesterday the girls were seated on the couch, happily reading a book together when Dad arrived with a carton of eggs and said “I’m making eggs for lunch, who wants one?”  They both said “yes please” not expecting him to throw the eggs at them BUT there was a bit of a malfunction in the execution of his trick.  He threw the first egg too high so it hit the wall behind Tomato, smashed into pieces and fell behind the couch, [which I thought was quite funny].  Undeterred, he then threw the second egg at Bacon (aged 3) who clearly did not understand what was going on, so she didn’t move and it hit her right in the eye!  Now I know you should never laugh when your child has been hurt so I sprinted out of the room before I collapsed laughing in front of them. Luckily my mom and obviously hubby, were around to console Bacon because I was doubled over in the kitchen with the tears pouring down my face, trying to laugh as quietly as I could without much success.  The more they scolded me for laughing the more I laughed, until I actually couldn’t breathe and had to go outside for 5 minutes to finish snorting.   

Luckily Bacon did not connect my laughing to her injury because when I got back after composing myself, the couch had been moved and the smashed egg retrieved and they were busy washing the dust and spider webs off it so they could eat it.  But the epic failure of this well-thought out trick had me in stitches for the rest of the day. Dad was of course mortified that he had hurled a missile and connected his little girl who is now sporting a red mark below her eye (luckily she didn’t get a shiner!) and was not impressed with my snorting from the kitchen.  

In my defense though, anyone who knows me, knows that funny comes first.  Once at school, I was walking down the stairs with my best friend Joan and she tripped and fell down the stairs, her suitcase went over the balustrade and she bounced down about 10 stairs and landed at the bottom with her skirt over her head.  People rushed to help her, someone fetched her bag and everyone was so concerned whether she was hurt, but where was I?  I couldn’t help her, I couldn’t even ask if she was okay because I was laughing so much I was battling to breathe, never mind formulate a question with any believable hint of concern!  She didn’t talk to me for a week!

What a weekend!!  Anyway Easter is still a week away so watch this space for more antics at home with my brood.